An open letter to the dad who walked out on me.

Subtitle: Dear Dad

From: Your Daughter unknown to you.

Date: June 10th 2022

When I was In my Pre teen years my mom showed me a picture of you, she even had a picture of you and my brother, your son, I believe that was my first time ever laying eyes on you. You left when I was born and never looked back,, You left me as a baby, such a (Dad) thing to do, right? Anyway!!!  outside of that picture any memory of you for me is a complete blur.

I know that because you are my dad  half of my DNA comes from you. Sometimes to this day it makes me sad because I don’t know in full about who I am where It relates to you, like, where were you born? What nationality were you or are you because the truth is I don’t even know to this day if you are dead or alive.

It would be interesting to know what traits or  quirks I have from you. When I was younger I remember having this habit of rubbing my fingers together rather quickly after I had potato chips or anything with crumbs just to get the crumbs off of my hands, my mom would often look at me (not always with a smile) and say your father did it the same way! So I guess it’s apparent that I got that from you. When I look back into my memory I see how much i look like you, I wonder if there are things we have in common.

As I got older in life I began to have questions but I never wanted to ask my mom because they were questions that needed to be answered by you, like, why did you leave? Did you leave because I was born? Did you not want me? You stayed with my brother for 2 whole years and then I was born and you left, why? Why did you never try to find me? In a world of ever advancing technology Why did you never try to find me?

They say, every girl needs her dad, I find that to be such a true saying, I guess it would have been nice to meet you in life, whatever happened between you and my mom was between the two of you but you left and never had a hand in raising me, your loss! You missed out on my first job, my first relationship, my first solo, mom was there for all of those, she picked up the slack and I will forever be grateful for her strength, her integrity, her love, for discipline, for raising me the best way she knew how.

I’m 39 years old Dad, I’ll be 40 in July, I never thought that I would find myself sitting and writing a Dear Dad letter but here I am.

Why write this letter after all these years? I’m not for certain but I feel as though this is my life’s closure where you are concerned, I feel like you were a coward, not because you left but because you never looked back, every child deserves the love of their parents but you were selfish. A part of me feels like I deserve to know why you didn’t care enough to be in our lives, the step Father I had growing up was…. Just there, he was no dad, no father figure at all.

My mom passed away years ago, she took a lot to the grave with her, there were questions I never gor to ask about you, the only family I knew and know to this dad is my mom, my brother and then my step fathers side of his family, I have no idea who I am or where I come from. 

I have 3 beautiful children who may never know their whole genealogy because I DON’T have a clue about who I am on my moms side or yours so how are they supposed to know, there’s not a day that goes by that the thought of that doesn’t make my heart sad.

Growing up it was just my mom, my brother and I for the most part, I can say that I had a decent childhood, mommy always made sure that we were good, we didn’t have much but she saw to it that she kept a smile on our faces even in the littlest of ways.

From the day that I was born up until this very day I have been an overcomer.  Did you know that when I was born the Dr’s told mom that I wouldn’t make it past 6 weeks? Here I am though. Did you know that I’m diagnosed with spinabifidia, the Doctors said I wouldn’t walk, that turned out to be miracle to, inspite of my condition I never let it stop me, no wheel chair, no back brace no nothing, just a regular kid turned adult who made it through.

There was a poet who said “Life for me ain’t been no crystal stair” I can certainly agree with that, however I can say that my life is pretty good.

Where ever you went, who ever you went with, what ever happened to you after you walked out of my life, u hope you found happiness, I don’t hate you, I never did, I just still have questions. 

If the universe should ever allow for our lives to cross paths IF you are alive then I just want to know where I come from, kind of put the puzzle pieces together, ya no? I would love to fully close the chapters and the book.

Until that day comes, should it come… I will continue to hold on to Hope.

Impact vs influence

What is the difference between being an Impact and being an Influence

Introduction Question.

Is there a difference between being an Impact and being an Influence? If so, what is the difference?

In today’s society whether you are at work, at school, in church or even in your community, to be effective you must be able to Command the room or the people that you are around in order to leave/ make a meaningful, lasting impact on the lives of those you are around.

Did you know that there are many people whether known or unknown who do not know that there is a difference between being an influence to others versus having an impact on others? Interestingly enough both of these words are not that far off from each other, they are actually quite similar in their nature because they both deal with having some kind of effect whether it be positive or negative. Interesting right? 

so then this poses two questions:

1. what does it mean to be an influence

2. what does it mean to be an Impact?

For a moment let’s take a look at both.

What does it mean to be an influence or influential? 

Influence is the ability to persuade others without the need to exude force or being overhearing.

The next question would be 

What does it mean to be an Impact?

Impact is to leave a deep rooted meaningful impression or footprint on others as to affect their mindset.

So then influence and impact although similar they wear different hats and may produce different outcomes.

  Lets use an example as simple as childhood, whether you are mom, dad, family, a teacher, a coach, a pastor or a mentor.. being  the right kind of Influence in a child’s life can lead to making a positive Impact in their life, that child will either go on to be successful and doing big things or they fall to the wayside in life simply because of your impact on them.

This brings to light two new questions:

1. How can I be an impact?

2. How can I be an influence to others

Let’s think this through for a moment.

Do you know that the truth of the matter is that there may well already be others who look up to you and you don’t even know it?

For some, being an influence may come off as easy but for others not so much. It’s not always easy to get people to listen to what you have to say or take you seriously, sometimes you have to create and establish the foundation of a relationship, if I don’t know or like you then why should I or would I listen to you?

Taking a sincere approach to truly get to know someone is a big deal, it can create an atmosphere for progress, it can open the right doors, and allow you to sit among those who you may have never imagined… Iyanla Vinzant said (you gotta do your work)… by doing your work (making the right connections, knowing how to talk to people,  establishing positive connections and a positive atmosphere, it will all lead to a great outcome.

After you’ve done the work you can be an impact on others because you now have their trust, you can now fully command the room.. now you can bring change because you have both Impact and influence on your side which will cause people to see you in a different, positive light.

Amanda Gormon

They call her the wordsmith!!!….

Amanda Gormon was born was born and raised in Los Angeles California, she began writing at a very young age, she has become the youngest inaugural poet in the history of the USA, she is an award winning writer and a graduate of Harvard University where she studied sociology

Amanda’s poems have opened many doors for her winning her invitations to the white house as well as allowing her to stand before people such as Al-Gore and Secretary Hillary Clinton and many others, she has been on the CBS morning show and has spoken at venues and events across the country.

Happy St. Patricks day|FREE St. Patty’s day kids coloring pages and puzzles.

https://brightlightinadimworld.files.wordpress.com/2022/02/wp-1645423461033.pdf

https://brightlightinadimworld.files.wordpress.com/2022/02/wp-1645423461264.pdf

https://brightlightinadimworld.files.wordpress.com/2022/02/wp-1645423461188.pdf

Sybil Ludington| The Female Paul Revere

Do you remember the story of The Midnight ride of Paul Revere well, this next young lady is said to be his female counterpart for her heroism.. she rode by horse for 40 miles to sound the alarm on an attack that was taking place. Read on to learn about Sybil Ludington, a true female hero.

Born April 5th 1761 in New York, she was the oldest of 12 children, she was a farmer and her father was a gristmille owner who served in the military for over sixty years.
Ludington’s father served in the French and Indian War and he was loyal to the British crown until 1773 when he joined the Patriots in the American Revolution, he was promoted to colonial of his regiment, the land they had bordered Connecticut and the Long Island sound.
On on April 26, 1777, a messenger reached the Ludington house with news of Gov. William Tryon’s attack on Danbury, Connecticut. Colonel Ludington began immediately to organize the local militia.

It is said that Colonel Ludington gave his daughter the order to take a horse, ride for the men, and tell them to be at his house by daybreak, she would then through the night, then being 16-year-old ride her horse nearly 40 miles (65 km) on unfamiliar roads around Putnam county, spreading the alarm. She ranged south to Mahopac and north to Stormville before returning home.
In October 1784 Sybil married Edward Ogden, a lawyer, and she lived in Unadilla until her death.

Henrietta Lacks| The Immortal woman.

1920-1951

Polio. Cancer. Cloning. Scientists researching these and many other areas have one thing in common: the human cells they use in their tests all come from a young African-American woman named Henrietta Lacks. Lacks was a 30-year-old farmer and mother of five who was diagnosed with cervical cancer in 1951. While she was being treated at John’s Hopkins, a sample of cancerous cells was taken form her cervix without her consent. A researcher soon discovered something remarkable about them: they wouldn’t die.

It’s incredibly difficult to grow human cells in a lab. Most die quickly or multiply only a few times once removed from the body. For reasons unknown, Lacks’ cells could be multiplied perpetually. Although Lacks passed away in 1951, her ‘immortal’ line of cells (known as HeLa) became integral to some of the most important medical research of our time, including the development of vaccines, in vitro fertilization, cloning, and gene mapping. Lacks’ children and grandchildren were not made aware of HeLa until the 1970s; raising important ethical questions about genetic research.

In 2013, the National Institute of Health signed an agreement to protect the family’s privacy and acknowledge them in future publications. 62 years after her death, the scientific community finally recognized Lacks’ invaluable contribution to biomedical research.

Article source:
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.refinery29.com/amp/en-us/2016/03/105351/womens-history-month-famous-females

Positive discipline in parenting


Children can/will make better decisions and life choices if we allow them to make mistakes, it is our job to then guide them and perhaps talk to them about what could have been done differently.

Positive discipline does not put forth blame but instead it teaches.