Having a big heart. (Lessons learned.)

One of the hardest lessons I have learned in this life is that having a big heart and being nice will often leave you with a broken heart and make you wonder if having friends or a social circle are really a good idea.

Having a big heart is such a blessing, you can share your smile, your generosity, your heart with the world and in return you may end up encouraging or putting a smile on someone’s face, someone who was on the verge of giving up or may at the time be on the verge of giving up may gain new strength to fight and to continue on just because you are that one person who truly cares.

Having a big heart, it’s not something that you can just turn off or on like a switch, it is who you are, no matter how you may in life try to change because you’ve realized that people have taken advantage of you for being the person that you are, it seems that you can’t fight it, i realize that i have come to terms with believing that those with a big heart are made extra special and sent from the heavens to in some way be a blessing in and to this world.

The biggest problem or challenge with having a big heart is that you are easily caught in the crossfires.

Well,  what do I mean by that ? 

when those around you whether it be your colleagues, friends, family members, or even the very person you are in a relationship with, they over extend your kindness and they knowingly use you, it becomes clear that they do not appreciate you or anything you do, they wholeheartedly take advantage of you. 

When you live a life where helping and being there for others comes naturally, it truly is a rewarding feeling because you are able to come to the aid of others, you are that shoulder, that pillow of comfort…..However…I certainly believe that because everyone is so used to you being there, when you now need someone, it seems confusing to them because there was never a need for them to be there for you or to consider you in return.

If i were to speak from my own experience, in my own view of things, then truth be told there were times when I wanted to run away from the world, and other times when i honestly just wanted to curl up into a ball and stay there, i  have wanted to create a bubble and build walls and keep everyone out just so that the hurt would stop and people would realize that i was not their punching bag, i wanted them to come to the realization that i was human to, that i came with feelings and emotions and the way they were treating me was uncool.

Let me close out by saying this, if you can relate to this blog, if you feel like being you is just not worth it and you are ready to tell the world where to go and what to do with themselves because you have just had enough!, take a moment and think on this thought:

This big, crazy world that we live in, it needs a you!, it needs the love you give, it needs to see that there are still some people out there with compassion in their hearts, it needs to see that there is still someone out there who isn’t afraid to be themselves and stand with strength no matter what is thrown their way. So please… don’t shut yourself away, continue to be you, spread love, spread those positive vibes, continue to be that light that someone needs because in truth you have no clue how many people you may come into contact with whose lives you will end up saving just because of that big heart of yours.

Don’t look back.

Our lives are full of history, filled with past and present events, like our first scratch on the knee, playing outside, our first bike ride, Our first kiss, that first relationship followed by the first heartbreak, our first jobs, our first real taste of the world. All these events that have served as a brick or the bricks that have led to the lives we have today.

As adults, sometimes we roll back the curtains of memory and get stuck remembering the bad things,
It’s important to not focus too much or get caught up in the negative things that have occurred in life, we must be sure to snap back to reality and separate who we were then from who we are in this time.

Philippians 3:13 (New living translation) says:
No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead.

Though I believe we shouldn’t look back, I do believe that we should take the time to reflect, to remind ourselves of how far we’ve come. God knows that as adults we do get discouraged and need a nudge every now and again or even  a gentle self reminder that we’ve come a long way and that we’ve done things right along the way which should encourage us to stay on the right path

Sometimes we forget or lose track of why we’re still going, we forget what we set out to accomplish, it is In these times that we have to remind ourselves that the journey, although as rocky and as discouraging or as rough as it may be, is worth it.

As life moves on and continues from day to day and year to year, don’t look back, don’t let whatever the mountains are in your life cause you to give up, continue to look forward. Onward and outward because your destiny is waiting for you.

Allow me to leave you with this,  it was Maya Angelo who said:

I am that Tree planted by the River,
Which will not be moved.

I, the Rock, I the River, I the Tree
I am yours–your Passages have been paid.

Lift up your faces, you have a piercing need
For this bright morning dawning for you.

History, despite its wrenching pain,
Cannot be unlived, but if faced
With courage, need not be lived again.

Lift up your eyes upon
This day breaking for you.
Give birth again
To the dream.

” The only reason you should look back is to see how far you’ve come”